With Apologies to Rabbie Burns

Once upon a time, lo these many years ago, CSE Cooney and I were on the phone, chattering. I said something which led to her talking about DANGER and LUVE and I said “My Luve is like a bloody rose!” To which she replied, “That’s newly sprung from wounds!” Consequently we decided we had to pastiche the whole thing, line by line. So.

For your delectation, in honour of the bonny man himself and this day of his birth, we offer the following:

MY LUVE IS LIKE A BLOODY ROSE
by CSE Cooney and Amal El-Mohtar

My luve is like a bloody rose
that’s newly sprung from wounds
My luve is a cacophany
Come howlin’ from the tombs.

As fair thou art, my bony lass
So ravenous am I
And I will dig thy grave, my dear
With a trowel of thy thigh.

With a trowel of thy thigh, my Dear
So sweet and whitely hewn,
Oh I will lay thee still, my luve,
And lay beside thee soon.

So fare thee well, my toothsome luve,
I’ll teethe on thee a while,
And with thy finger-bone, my luve,
I’ll pick thee from my smile.

#SFWApro